Maya Dixon, A’22
Her father and mother were simple people. They always dreamed of coming to a kingdom that seemed to have endless opportunities. The kingdom was a p lace where one could be whomever they wanted and achieve whatever they desired. Her father, a tall man, arrived when he was just a young boy. He came from a place where the land produced diamonds in their purest form. Her mother arrived when she was a young adult. She came from an island that appeared to be situated in one body of water. However, she was surrounded by constantly mixing waters her whole life. They could have only met in this kingdom, for they were from distant lands, of different peoples. Despite their differences, they fell in love and became inseparable. Soon after, they were expecting their first child, a daughter.
Being born in the new kingdom made it so she felt she belonged. She resonated with the subjects who were so much like her. She always thought that they shared a history. She was from here and elsewhere at once. They had also come here from many different places, much earlier, and made this theirs. Her father often judged the same subjects she felt connected to, disassociated from them, and even disparaged them. He believed they did not appreciate or take advantage of the opportunities the kingdom had to offer. She hated the fact that he judged these people as she felt most connected to them. She would explain how he was one of them and so was she. She was constantly arguing with her father about how the kingdoms, the subjects and their struggles were also their own. Her father rejected her claims emphasizing there was no connection.
All her life she questioned and doubted her father’s purity. She decided to conduct a test. While her father was asleep she collected three strands of hair. She took these to an oracle. The oracle was an old woman who was all knowing. Her mind was open to see all truths. She carefully unpacked and gave her three spiraly strands of her father’s hair. After cleansing the room and her materials she began the ritual. She took the strands and placed them in what appeared a mortar and pestle. As the oracle ground and ground she was waiting for the color to change. The color changed would reveal the truth. Not only would it reveal the truth but it would reveal that her father was in fact just like her. She wanted the stigma that he perpetuated to be felt in him. The truth was important to her not only to prove her father wrong but, she was seeking a sense of belonging in the kingdom. She wanted to look at her father and be able to say you are like me. She wanted to be able to share experiences, culture and histories with other subjects like her. She wanted to feel a connection to the land but mostly, she wanted her father to empathize and understand how the history of the subjects who were already here lived and experienced the same reality.
With each grind that the oracal did she wished the color would get darker. However, with each grind she lost hope. The oracle scraped the mixture out and wiped it on a white sheet to see its true color. There was no light reflecting any other color from the mixture; it was pure black. She had been so sure there was going to be at least a little tint of red, white or blue. However, she was wrong. The purity her father claimed to hold was there. The knowledge she acquired completely changed the history she thought that she had. The knowledge she acquired made her reconsider her existence within this kingdom. At that moment she felt she had no right to the things she thought she had claimed in common with the other subjects. At that moment she realized she wasn’t connected to this kingdom. Despite being born in it she realized she had no ties to the kingdom, that she was not of it. She wanted to be tied to the land however, there was no connection to it in her blood. Discovering that the experiences of those people were not hers, she set out to find the place where they were.